This Year's Philosophy

Christmas Dinner:  Knödel (mashedish potato balls), rotkohl (red, sweeter sauerkraut),
green beans, apple soda-like drink, and THE roast duck.

It could be because it's the end of the year.  It could be because we're away from our families.  It could be because I just finished reading an incredibly intense novel about life's futility, Vietnam, and the cruelties of war (called Matterhorn, if you're feeling like a little existentialism for your New Year).

But, I've been feeling particularly pensive the past couple days.

And by pensive, I generally mean a strange feeling of being simultaneously grateful, sad, happy, guilt-ridden, and a bit of an emotional zombie.

Because always, around this time of year, I look around me and think of how much I have that so many other people in the world need, other things I want with all my heart but am just starting to realize might never happen, and how much better of a person I need to be every day because who knows when you might get shipped off to 'Nam and deployed into the bush to hump through the jungle with the ill-fated Bravo company of the U.S. Marines (that book really is affecting me, I know).

And, like every year, this week between Christmas and the "get ready, set GO!" of the New Year, I've been trying to work through all these thoughts and come up with my next year's Philosophy.  This is sort of what I'm homing in on:

1.  

You can control most things in your life, but not everything.

2.  

But you can't let your whole entire life and existence get wrapped up in the one or ten or fifty things you can't control.

3.  

Because there're 50 billion other things you can control.  

4.  

And maybe the secret to happiness isn't getting yourself to not care about the things you can't control.  Maybe the secret to happiness is recognizing those things that might never be, letting yourself really morn that thing (cuss at it/kick a rock/cry a lot/make sure that it really isn't something you can control), and then look around, wipe your hands on your trousers, and say, "Alright!  What else is going on around here?"

And then you might see the helicopters comin' into your camp's LZ to take you for some R&R in Okinawa, or your incredibly handsome, wonderful husband bringing you a box of tissues, a bowl of some sort of amazing German cheesy noodle ham food he made, and a hug.  And you realize you're going to make it through this beepity-beepin' war.


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And as a side note, I want someone to confirm for me that soldiers in Vietnam really were given drinks with names like "Choo Choo Cherry" and "Bugs Bunny Grape."